They Ain’t no Barley

Ok guys, this is gross. If you happen eat around with friends of the E-San and see what seems to barley beans, ask first. This was a picture I took from the menu. Those white bean like stuffs – red ants eggs (the curry pok antz we call them in Singapore, those in rambutan trees). I don’t want no ants to crawl out me backside hole, I don’t wanna eat them.

Eating in Lanta

Strange it was how mushy the crabs, it was like cream of crab dug from the fissures of the half body. Stanger it was the way the parrot fish meat just disintegrated with the pinch of my chopsticks. Only the consolation we had from the white prawns, the meat still sweat and tight. Where had all the fresh seafood gone? A sea town Sala Dan, the restaurant we dined named after – Sala Dan Restaurant. Ain’t a sea town by the sea supposed to have the freshest of catch, the fish meat sweet and white? Nay.


On this island getaway, all the freshest of catch, all had been snapped by the Chefs. At a premium they will pay, so why should the folks keep them for later part of the day. We envisage a sea town where the best of food will be kept for the local taste. But this is a misconception now in these days. To have good seafood, eat only in posh restaurants on the island. Only then your palate will truly be satisfied, that is if you are willing to pay. I’m not.


Dissatisfied we left the restaurant, and feel cheated we did for 300 grams of prawn charged when there were only 200 I had witnessed weighted. To be on Lanta, the best seafood will not be in the local eatery. How so saddening, commercialism had set in. The small engine putted in the dark roads back to Cha Da Resort. The roads were wet it had rained. Raining season in Thailand we knew starts from mid April to late October, but not so as told by the driver steering us back to our pool clad hideaway. In Lanta, the season starts in March, the tour operations were ceasing and they had only 2 boats out of many in service. Soon by end of April, the seas will be fiercely strong. The sky will no longer be forgiving, the winds will work with the storms. Lanta will then operate on low season, till November when tourism returns to norm.

Click here for full photo sets under Lazing in Lanta Mar 2009.

Eating out in Sing Buri

Working life in Thailand, an adventure everyday. MacDonald’s is not everywhere, we eat where the cows shit on the roads, we eat wherever we find anything that looks like they serve food. Venturing to a far away customer in Sing Buri, no big petrol kiosk could be found that had a civilized clean toilet. Hungry we were, we turned into a very quiet deserted house with a big sign stating “Quay Teow” (noodle soup).


Chairs and tables stacked, one lonely woman sat under the wooden roof baked by the searing afternoon sun. We could not find food for miles, we just had to eat what we found. And there in contradiction, she said no Quay Teow served, never bought noodles for the day. We could however order anything we want, such as fired rice and such. In the midst of occasional ten wheelers roaring by, it seemed we were the first customers in this entire world she had. Deserted, isolated, no one seemed to have eaten there in decades. A rolling stack of passing hay would have made the scene pretty dramatic. Our bottles of Coke were served, the ice she said “we don’t have much today, never buy”. Coke, okay it tasted like Coke… minus the bubbles that were supposed to effervescent. I sipped the dull water pondering if she bought the carton 20 years ago, one bottle served once annually.


Some chickens walked by pecking the hard ground, some very elderly chicken. Waited for so many years to be eaten, their feather were tattered, they were balding. One stared at me, and in its stare told me telepathically “order fried whole chicken or I will commit suicide tomorrow, please eat me”.


Someone came by and the place was soon immersed in the sharp melodic strumming of old E-San music. A juke box, it still worked I thought it didn’t. It had a TV in, a very old TV embedded. I believe the jukebox was made when I was still a sperm.


I ate my fried rice on the aluminum table top. The sunny side up egg slapped on top of my cuisine. Was it an egg on the way to the status of century egg? Never mind, I was hungry I just ate. Swallowing the bits, I stared up the wooden wall. The calendar, the most interesting artifact, was actually a wanted list of criminals. Just my another day in Thailand.

MacIdiots Thailand

In Thailand, we have a new item on the menu in McDonald's. No, it is not MacIdiots, it is Shake Shake Fries (Fries put together with tasty powdering sprinkled to be shaken in a paper bag). Rather delicious but getting one order can present quite a challenge. Twice I ordered “Shake Fries” and they gave me “Cheese Fries”. At first, I thought I was the idiot who ordered the wrong item and not remembering it. But after the second incident, I realized something. There are MacIdiots here, other wise known as “dek-serve” (young server).

When one unfamiliar English word comes before the word Fries forming two words in total, it means Cheese Fries. If two unfamiliar English words come after Fries forming three words in total, it means Fries Shake Shake (aka…. Shake Fries). Fries Shake Shake, or Shake Fries? Oh for the love of Buddha… Shake in the sentence means I want shaken Fries, not CHEESE! They told me I should have said Fry Chake Chake, or Chake Fry, notice they don’t have the S sound within. They way the Thai tongue is made, they can’t pronounce the S within certain words. Neither can they recognize it. It is like they have a low pass filter connecting their eardrums to brain or something.

I was conversing in Thai the whole of the two incidents, only the Shake Fries I said in English. If an Amoeba could listen, their intellect levels could outmatch that of the “dek-serves”. Fries Shake Shake - new item, MacIdiots, always been around.

Tom Kah Soup

As tourist we go Thai restaurant, and we stereotypingly always order Tom Yam Soup. Next time, try to order Tom Kah Soup. My favorite so far is Tom Kah Kung (Prawns in spicy Thai coconut soup). But be warned, it seems like a difficult dish, for most restaurants I went does not make a good dish of this. Barn Lai at Ekamai have good ones. Some obscure restaurants in the harbors of Laem Chabang make good ones too. Trail and error, discover for yourself the other tastes of Thailand.

Rayong Clams, Big and Yummy

No, I was not on holiday again. Just a casual lunch we don’t know where to eat. Along the coast of Rayong we drove, the thousand shacks lined the road a plenty. We had lunch, a casual lunch. And next to the sea on the sands we sat. The repetitive sound of waves breaking, surprisingly just another working day in Thailand. In sharp contrast to eating in the concretes of Singapore, I say Yipee yay yeah.

Dining on the Phuket Cliffs – Cheap

And again, why we should rent cars when on holiday destinations. I was on work, not on holiday. I was looking for a place to eat, the rental car I drove devouring the curves and slopes of Phuket. We stumbled on the E-San food shack up the hill. I had a choice, the concrete building with the fancy restaurant name that had the “welcome farang” feel, or the wooden shacks that looks like it will be blown down into the sea during heavy storm. I choose the later to discover the idyllic simple sitting arrangements hidden from view by the road. It was simple E-San food at slightly expensive price. THB$400 for three of us, as we savored our eyes did too. Just don’t drink here get high, will fall off the cliff for sure. The sunny sun, the shady tables. The view, the air, the sea. This is the life, this is my life.